summer's gone

I remember meeting him through a friend. He was, hot - those eyes that kill and that angel curved smile and a sleeping child’s charm – they all just know how to melt anyone’s heart. Heard him talk the first time – and I think I have lost my heart then, probably went falling – hard, that it hurts.

For long I have not given much thought about him. He was my friend’s Coco – and damn it hurts! I thought; he’s one of those guys, sly enough not to fall unto my schemes. Indeed he was – and for that I loved him even more. But the more I do, the more I realize how fanciful my thoughts are. And so, I decided to park the feeling, kill the flame whilst it’s still not ablaze; bury the emotion while it hasn’t started to breathe full life.


For a while I didn’t hear of his Naruto and manga. He was not in my inbox anymore, not in my chat box too. And for quite some time now, I have not heard my heart call his name.

But today, the sun showed up.
After the longest of rains, the sun suddenly smiled and kissed the moist off my boulevard’s pavements.

I was seated near the window, stealing precious time off my duty hours, wandering how warm it was outside – and there came he, the once, I have hoped for, to be my sun, my warmest hug.

Walking with his pals, he still has that smile. He laughed, and I have known, he still is that same guy I have laughed, so hard, with at Lolo’s, the guy I have beheld peacefully sleep in his arms while calmly breathing life into my heart. I know he’s still the guy with the warmest hug. I am certain, he’s still that guy who took my hand and held it tight and that same guy with the loveliest of all eyes. He’s still that same guy who took my breath away – for quite a while.

The chair I was seating on started to feel overly comfortable as he stopped and stayed. He was at the landing of the stairs right next to the window – I had a good view, and he’s utterly oblivious of my peeking. For a while I was looking at him, fancy standing near him, laughing again, the way I have laughed that night at Lolos. I wish I am seated near him again listening to his Naruto. I dreamt of lying next to him who’s peacefully dozed on his arms, calming my heart with his every breath.

The sun was warm outside, but I felt warmer - inside my cold little alcove.

For a while, an apparition stayed right before my eyes, allowed me to dream again – even for a while.

But just like all phantoms, he soon faded with the smoke.

I don’t really know him anymore, he doesn’t do me either. I wish, though, I do, he does; that we still do.
He’s not so hard to like, even love – but not me, hindi madaling mahalin ang isang tulad ko. Sya na nga rin mismo nagsabi, I love you, but love isn’t enough.


Hindi nga ba? O sadyang duwag din sya.
None the less, he would always be my JaCo – and, I, a past forgotten.