With much apprehension, I started editing my resume today -tailored fit the thing to the work description of an NSTP formator. (deep breathe, almost a sigh)
I really don’t know, I mean I have pending applications, most of which Manila based, and am just waiting for further processes, as my application has been positively entertained. I checked my email days ago and much of them speak of assurance that details are being plotted out so that when I fly to Manila, things’ll be smooth already. But…
Amidst all this, there live inside my heart a little voice that shouts (as loud as it can I guess) that I ought to stay. The lungga is so comfty a place for me to leave, the Ateneo is so prestigious-a-name for me to exchange with other employers and my heart says it has found its missing piece, who by the way, decided to stay.
Torn. I ask, now what?
Is there anything harder than this? Aside from the fact that I might lose my left eyesight, I want to believe that things are laid easy for me now – but it’s not. Crossroads are a headache.
I would love to leave as much as I want to stay. Would it be the future I imagined it to be – uptight clothes, flashy working environment and dreams coming true – or would it be what my heart somehow tries to insinuate, blue blooded formator with a passionate heart ready to take a chance again in a place called home? Wah! Freak out!
Charles told me last night he’s dumbfounded when I confessed my JaCo thingy (that I care, wink, much more than he knows), now I guess I would need a word a degree higher, or maybe two or even higher than that so to describe how overwhelmed I am.
(deep breathe, now it’s a sigh)
the little wonderer is lost, lost with which road to take :((
Showing posts with label year one. Show all posts
Showing posts with label year one. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011
yearONE
It’s a little funny that just when I wanted to start things over, meaning; delete my facebook account and make a new one, change my number and shun those I wish to, about 5gig of my most treasured possessions got corrupted. Pack the shit! Damn talaga! Just because I had to print something, I used my flash drive to have it printed sa isang walang hiyang computer shop just outside Ateneo; my new favorite songs, my recent pictures and school files, not to mention my blogs – all got corrupted. Even the working draft I have for my farewell video (para sa lungga) was not spared. It’s a little bullshit, seriously.
But it’s spilled milk. So I’ll fuss not.
Instead, I’d use it as a primer to what I am about to write, which means, what you are about to read - YEAR ONE. It has been my tradition to write something about how I plan to append an upcoming year (or in this case, what has recently dawned). My old-forgotten-for-a-good-reason blog has a bunch of which. Most of them contain wish lists, goals and how-to’s, people I plan to spend time more with, things I want to explore and try, blah blah blah.
I would be writing (and you’ll read) something almost the same, but this year is rather special. As you might know, I am graduating come March (fingers crossed, really tight) thus, come April, I would officially be on my own. And so, Year ONE starts.
I can’t wait for many things! maraming una at huling mga bagay…
Last Assessment – at pila sa treasurer’s, ang final Final Exam, First Diploma (oo, babalik din ako, hhhaha) Last class, first application, unang employer’s call, First interview, first you’re hired, first day at work, first pay check, first pad (I’d probably share it with someone, fun) My first wise expense, first yuppie night out, Last student-sabado night, first investments, my first self bought baby (sana, sana) Last na hingi ng allowance, Unang undies that I would buy out of my money (hhahaha, wala lang tuwa lang ako sa thought) First OB, even my first sick leave, unang company desk (or cubicle), first professional’s blog, unang beses pumasok ng Ateneo using Alumni ID, first cake na ako lang uubos (syempre out of my sweldo) unang Havaianas that I would buy on my own, last na clothing allowance from Aya, last na handy-down, unang Starbucks on a real coffee break, unang lunch date sa company cafeteria, first memo received, my Strike One, unang office Xmas party, unang car loan, first savings, unang elevator moment with my office crush, last na matulog ka na, gabi na ah, last na ipagDrive si Achi Kun, unang gifts ko for my pamangkins and for my Achis and Aya, kay Papa din, out of my 13thmonth pay, unang bonus, last na nood kaming sine, pahingi 100. Unang pagod na pagod ako LRT ride with matching emo mode, Unang dinner date with ate Nikki (na ako ang magbabayad), Last na wash the dishes after we eat chore, Unang panakaw na chat sa FB with my nanay Ves, unang train ride (ever), Unang all credit card shopping spree, last na malamig na pasko, unang pasko na ako ang taya, first na ma-complete ang simbang gabi, unang simba sa Quiapo, unang kandila, unang job well done, first company ID, and blah blah blah basta madami…
2011 is a year of great joy for me, alam mo yung pakiramdam that ‘finally!’ – yung tipong after days of being constipated eh nakaramdam ka ng tawag. Yung tipong after battling with the ticking of every minute passing eh nag-reply sya sa text mong kamusta po?. That same feeling that you get when your sundo finally arrives in the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere – ganun tsong! Every day since day one of this year, I look forward to the unfolding of the hours. It’s a feeling of hope, of great anticipation, excitement and energy with the hint of a little fear of what may really happen. It’s a little funny that parang hindi ka makapag hintay pero takot ka din because you really don’t know. It’s even funnier how I have become more patient, more understanding and focused – kasi kung ordinaryong araw lang I would have freaked out in finding out that my files have been corrupted. Pero look at me now, taking things slow but easy, not fussing and finally determined to do things for myself. Pakiramdam ko, I am growing older each day and yet closer to my youth’s prime every hour passing, closer to what they call, I would call the best days of my life. Basta, natutuwa ako o.0
But it’s spilled milk. So I’ll fuss not.
Instead, I’d use it as a primer to what I am about to write, which means, what you are about to read - YEAR ONE. It has been my tradition to write something about how I plan to append an upcoming year (or in this case, what has recently dawned). My old-forgotten-for-a-good-reason blog has a bunch of which. Most of them contain wish lists, goals and how-to’s, people I plan to spend time more with, things I want to explore and try, blah blah blah.I would be writing (and you’ll read) something almost the same, but this year is rather special. As you might know, I am graduating come March (fingers crossed, really tight) thus, come April, I would officially be on my own. And so, Year ONE starts.
I can’t wait for many things! maraming una at huling mga bagay…
Last Assessment – at pila sa treasurer’s, ang final Final Exam, First Diploma (oo, babalik din ako, hhhaha) Last class, first application, unang employer’s call, First interview, first you’re hired, first day at work, first pay check, first pad (I’d probably share it with someone, fun) My first wise expense, first yuppie night out, Last student-sabado night, first investments, my first self bought baby (sana, sana) Last na hingi ng allowance, Unang undies that I would buy out of my money (hhahaha, wala lang tuwa lang ako sa thought) First OB, even my first sick leave, unang company desk (or cubicle), first professional’s blog, unang beses pumasok ng Ateneo using Alumni ID, first cake na ako lang uubos (syempre out of my sweldo) unang Havaianas that I would buy on my own, last na clothing allowance from Aya, last na handy-down, unang Starbucks on a real coffee break, unang lunch date sa company cafeteria, first memo received, my Strike One, unang office Xmas party, unang car loan, first savings, unang elevator moment with my office crush, last na matulog ka na, gabi na ah, last na ipagDrive si Achi Kun, unang gifts ko for my pamangkins and for my Achis and Aya, kay Papa din, out of my 13thmonth pay, unang bonus, last na nood kaming sine, pahingi 100. Unang pagod na pagod ako LRT ride with matching emo mode, Unang dinner date with ate Nikki (na ako ang magbabayad), Last na wash the dishes after we eat chore, Unang panakaw na chat sa FB with my nanay Ves, unang train ride (ever), Unang all credit card shopping spree, last na malamig na pasko, unang pasko na ako ang taya, first na ma-complete ang simbang gabi, unang simba sa Quiapo, unang kandila, unang job well done, first company ID, and blah blah blah basta madami…
2011 is a year of great joy for me, alam mo yung pakiramdam that ‘finally!’ – yung tipong after days of being constipated eh nakaramdam ka ng tawag. Yung tipong after battling with the ticking of every minute passing eh nag-reply sya sa text mong kamusta po?. That same feeling that you get when your sundo finally arrives in the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere – ganun tsong! Every day since day one of this year, I look forward to the unfolding of the hours. It’s a feeling of hope, of great anticipation, excitement and energy with the hint of a little fear of what may really happen. It’s a little funny that parang hindi ka makapag hintay pero takot ka din because you really don’t know. It’s even funnier how I have become more patient, more understanding and focused – kasi kung ordinaryong araw lang I would have freaked out in finding out that my files have been corrupted. Pero look at me now, taking things slow but easy, not fussing and finally determined to do things for myself. Pakiramdam ko, I am growing older each day and yet closer to my youth’s prime every hour passing, closer to what they call, I would call the best days of my life. Basta, natutuwa ako o.0
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