I used to think that I charm people, well, I still do, but now I try to be careful and figure out if it’s plain self absorption or me, simply over rating myself.
The past days has been crucial, I had like bunch of interviews, deadlines and many other things that sapped the energy out of me, too bad, I guess some included my esteem. Anyhow, Imma kick butts still, I was born this way.
Today I had my interview for service award, I was scheduled 1:30 but I was interviewed almost two already. Before that, my eldest sister called, checking on me, damn, that was pressure. But none the less, I was really delighted he called, as in, meant a lot. Shortly after that, I checked my email, another ‘sorry’ but your application is denied blah blah blah. So, yah, guess I’m trying to tell you that I had a real day today, big time, but none the less, the adobo rice at Coko did help ( I ate a lot, after to distress) and the time I had with JaCo and Bossing bought me some time off the things that’s been keeping caffeine dependent recently, cheers to that I did finish watching ‘crazy little thing called love’ tonight as well, and yah, I have figured out the movie even before it ended, but still, gave me that ‘hai’ dose of love.
Days could be totally overwhelming, especially now that I am at the phase of my life that though I am sure of my future, there are things that simply has to unravel, and like the grand entrance of a grand star, the stage gets smoky and all. This phase sucks if you’ll take it hard, but you’d get the fun of the joke when you simply laugh it out :)
Showing posts with label graduation jitters. Show all posts
Showing posts with label graduation jitters. Show all posts
Monday, March 21, 2011
Monday, February 7, 2011
Jitters
If there would be two words that’ll describe me and my situation now, that’ll be jitters and fervid. Well, the first is way too obvious, I’m graduating, vying for an award (who knows, awards, hhhehe, wishful thinking) at the same time trying to comply with my requirements, that damn are way too many, and they have piled already. Phew. The second word means, extreme mood swings, quite a new term for bipolar; all because, due to (refer to the first word) I really can’t sleep well anymore, been preoccupied most of the time, and damn, I can’t concentrate well, been talking much also lately, talking non-sense actually, tapos maya maya I’d feel alone, sad, then one moment I’d be motivated again, positive and all, phew, I’m getting crazy
But anyhow, I do understand, I myself have been trying to be patient with my emotions, too. the countdown has already begun and the clock is ticking fast, that’s why I’d make sure I live one day at a time muna. Pray much in between toiling and sweating it all out. Malapit na, malapit lapit na din, ngayon pa ba ako susuko, laban, diba.
With sweaty palms now as I type this, I say AMEN to all and everything. Masyadong masaya ang mundo for me to sulk, I don’t even have the right to feel small, coz I know I am not, marami na din akong napatunayan sa sarili ko just to lose it with this trying time. Hindi ah, I won’t allow it, my Lord’s been faithful to me and, damn, I am living my teenage dream, madaming hustle bustle but the road shall clear again. As the cliché goes, God destroys one to make it better, thus I am neither losing it nor heading somewhere epic but rather I am being shaken, hard, so that the kick does kick well – and hard. Bring it on and I am ready…
As Coelho said…
When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.
And so tonight, and for the many nights that were a prelude to tonight, I swear for their sake that I shall live fully, that I shall sing in the showers, smile at the sun and the moon and work my toes hard, keep those dreams awake and ride the winds of change, keep my faith ever ablaze and kiss hello a hundred years to live.
Before I end this entry, I would like share my word of the day, probab;y even for the many coming days, since I started with words, allow me to end it with another word, I saw this at the office today as I render my fourth to the last duty day at the CLG, the word that perfectly describe as well what I have written above, the only reason I have chosen so to stand above my ordeal, the word that I shall always remember especially in the upcoming days, the word that I know would take me to places and where my heart belongs…
PERSIST. (o.0)
But anyhow, I do understand, I myself have been trying to be patient with my emotions, too. the countdown has already begun and the clock is ticking fast, that’s why I’d make sure I live one day at a time muna. Pray much in between toiling and sweating it all out. Malapit na, malapit lapit na din, ngayon pa ba ako susuko, laban, diba.
With sweaty palms now as I type this, I say AMEN to all and everything. Masyadong masaya ang mundo for me to sulk, I don’t even have the right to feel small, coz I know I am not, marami na din akong napatunayan sa sarili ko just to lose it with this trying time. Hindi ah, I won’t allow it, my Lord’s been faithful to me and, damn, I am living my teenage dream, madaming hustle bustle but the road shall clear again. As the cliché goes, God destroys one to make it better, thus I am neither losing it nor heading somewhere epic but rather I am being shaken, hard, so that the kick does kick well – and hard. Bring it on and I am ready…
As Coelho said…
When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.
And so tonight, and for the many nights that were a prelude to tonight, I swear for their sake that I shall live fully, that I shall sing in the showers, smile at the sun and the moon and work my toes hard, keep those dreams awake and ride the winds of change, keep my faith ever ablaze and kiss hello a hundred years to live.
Before I end this entry, I would like share my word of the day, probab;y even for the many coming days, since I started with words, allow me to end it with another word, I saw this at the office today as I render my fourth to the last duty day at the CLG, the word that perfectly describe as well what I have written above, the only reason I have chosen so to stand above my ordeal, the word that I shall always remember especially in the upcoming days, the word that I know would take me to places and where my heart belongs…
PERSIST. (o.0)
2/1/11
I do not intend to write anything really, I just want to think aloud…
Today has been pretty fine, quite boring coz I spent almost 3 and a half hours at the gym for the upcoming Job Fair 11’s dry run, and worst it was almost a one man show, just me and ate Elaine, but anyway, it has been fun.
Last night I was able to finish the Alchemist, after days of meaning to read it, finally, sa ikatlong upuan ay natapos ko din, and I would like to lift a few lines.
There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.
When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.
"It's called the principle of favorability. When you play cards the first time, you are almost sure to win. Beginner's luck."
"And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."
Isn’t it a little funny, that these lines resounds louder that ever lately. Damn, I would really be graduating soon. I was telling nga Vhanny kanina that after the Triumph pictorial, it all began to sink into me, deeper this time. And in a few days, Job Fair na, sooner Love Rendezvous and then yLead na, pagkatapos nun, tapos na tsong! Naman!
In the immediate future, magaaply ako sa different companies, would be trying my beginners luck. Nakakatuwa lang that, sa wakas, eto na to. For three years I would help in ushering seniors during the Jobfair, ngayon ako naman ang makikipag sapalaran, sit amongst my friends that are as well my competition. Nakatuwa, nakakasabik.
And so tonight, I would start my countdown to March.
28 days, one down, 27 more to go.
Amen. Amen.
Today has been pretty fine, quite boring coz I spent almost 3 and a half hours at the gym for the upcoming Job Fair 11’s dry run, and worst it was almost a one man show, just me and ate Elaine, but anyway, it has been fun.
Last night I was able to finish the Alchemist, after days of meaning to read it, finally, sa ikatlong upuan ay natapos ko din, and I would like to lift a few lines.
There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.
When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.
"It's called the principle of favorability. When you play cards the first time, you are almost sure to win. Beginner's luck."
"And, when you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."
Isn’t it a little funny, that these lines resounds louder that ever lately. Damn, I would really be graduating soon. I was telling nga Vhanny kanina that after the Triumph pictorial, it all began to sink into me, deeper this time. And in a few days, Job Fair na, sooner Love Rendezvous and then yLead na, pagkatapos nun, tapos na tsong! Naman!
In the immediate future, magaaply ako sa different companies, would be trying my beginners luck. Nakakatuwa lang that, sa wakas, eto na to. For three years I would help in ushering seniors during the Jobfair, ngayon ako naman ang makikipag sapalaran, sit amongst my friends that are as well my competition. Nakatuwa, nakakasabik.
And so tonight, I would start my countdown to March.
28 days, one down, 27 more to go.
Amen. Amen.
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